Living with type one diabetes is a challenge, not just for the person diagnosed but also for their loved ones.
To provide perspective, Transcend asked Madeline Garifullin, founder of Low on The Go and the partner of someone living with T1D, to share her experience.
Madeline offers an inside look at what it's like to support a significant other with this chronic condition. From the initial diagnosis to daily management, she provides an honest account of the ups and downs. Madeline's story sheds light on the importance of understanding and open communication in a relationship impacted by T1D. As a partner, her role is invaluable and we appreciate her willingness to tell her story in hopes that it will help others facing similar circumstances.
My name is Maddie and my husband, Ruslan, and I have been together for 6 years now. We met through work at Starbucks and now are married and have a beautiful daughter.
Ru was diagnosed when he was 15 years old so he has been a diabetic for 13 years. He was type 1 for quite a while before we met and I don’t think there was necessarily an exact moment that he told me he was T1D. I just saw him take insulin and check his blood sugar when we worked together and early into dating and I never really felt a certain way about it. Maybe this is because he was already diagnosed but it just was a part of him and I loved him so it made no difference to me.
I will say that Ruslan being diabetic encouraged me to be healthier, so I am very grateful in that aspect. I am also super grateful to be so knowledgeable now about T1D! There is a huge lack of education and I think if I wasn’t with him I wouldn’t know what to do if someone dropped low or to consider carbs when eating food.
Although there are moments when it is tough, it taught him a lot about health, which inherently enlightened me as well.
I have drastically changed my eating habits (which at the end of the day is a huge positive!) and also incorporated more exercise into my life. I wanted to do those things with Ruslan and not have separate things for him to ensure that diabetes wasn’t this thing that made him feel different.
I have also learned to always have sugar on me in case of an emergency. I find myself always having to think a little bit ahead for that when we travel and go for longer road trips or drives where sugar may not be easily accessible. Emotionally, the hardest part has been staying calm when Ru has low blood sugar, but also quick to act when he needs me. The first time he had a huge low, it was scary for me to realize that realistically, I could lose him this way. Now I am much more level-headed about those situations and worry less when I get a low notification because we both know what to do.
Now that Ruslan has a pump and a CGM there isn’t as much to remind him about. However, when he was on injections, I would usually do a quick checklist before we leave to make sure we had his insulin, checker, and low snacks. Now when we travel I try to remember extra insulin in case of emergency, extra sensors, and extra pods.
On rough days I try my absolute best to let him know that he is doing incredible. I can truly see how much of a toll T1D takes when he’s trying to accomplish things and has high or low blood sugar. I remind him I am always here for him and that it is okay to take a slower day when he doesn’t feel good. I also do my best to handle a lot of setting up his appointments and calling companies for replacements (such as his sensors and pumps) in the hopes that it takes some of the responsibility off of him.
I just want him to know how impressed I am with him for having T1D and yet still owning his own business and being an amazing father and husband.
It is really hard sometimes to see him struggle. He always finds a way to push through but on the days where it is harder, I can’t help but feel sad that I can’t take it away. It is hard because although I can understand to an extent and be there for support I will never fully know what he feels like in those moments of stubborn highs and scary lows. All I can do is support him through these challenging moments and do my best to stay educated and be understanding when it causes him to feel frustrated. The strength you need to have to go through life as a diabetic is crazy.
The moments of low panic helped to inspire Low on the Go. The understanding of the challenges and frustrations of being T1D made me want to create a product to take just one thing off their plate. On top of that, I wanted to also create something for people with T1D to look forward to, because really, there isn’t too much positive in regards to having the illness.
I have a huge passion for this community and how much they do just to make up for what their pancreas CAN’T do for them. I hope this product can make people happy and also hope to create a space where T1Ds can come together or come to us when they need support.
My biggest advice for partners of T1D’s is to be patient and understanding. Shower them with extra love when they are having a tough day. Stay with them when they are low or high even if they say you don’t need to - a couple of hours lost to ensure they feel supported is well worth it, in my opinion.
Communicate with them to know what they would prefer from you when they are feeling the effects of low or high blood sugar and ask what you can do to help. Sometimes it's space, sometimes affection.
Some moments are hard, but overall it doesn’t affect our lives too much. We still travel, have a child, work on our passions, go out to eat and everything else that people without a T1D in their family do!
I have learned patience, kindness, and support in a completely different way. I have learned that people with T1D are incredible and it does take a lot of extra work on top of everything else that we have to do on a day-to-day basis.
If your partner has diabetes, keep supporting them. That is the best thing you can do. Stay up late with them when they have a low if you can. Help them change their sites so they can have a break. Grab their snacks when they are low (even when they insist they don’t need you to!) and love them harder on the days they need it.
I hope in the future we can continue to advance technology to make the process of managing diabetes easier and that more and more people can be educated on the disease and how to help diabetics through the thick of it.